but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
