you would pick up someone in the library
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
