My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize