2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
