No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Randomize
