Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize