What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
