I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
