you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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