think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
i love accidental penises.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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