Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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