i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
