Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize
