I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
