the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
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