She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
