I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
