Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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