u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
