Girls should come with a carfax report
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
