You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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