There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
