I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
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