A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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