East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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