Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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