so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
