I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
