I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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