i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
