For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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