I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
