he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
