Sponge bath it is.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
