What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize