soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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