This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
We left an ass print on the piano.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize