he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
