you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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