if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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