I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
Randomize