He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
