honey bunches of taint.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
