am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goatâ€
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
