With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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