I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize