So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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