I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
