I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
