I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
