look no pants
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize