It's Friday. Sex?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Did I show you my penis last night?
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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